Friday, May 29, 2015

Blog 121: Life is Fucking Weird

Blog 121: Life is Fucking Weird…

Ya…so I have been super quiet for some time…it probably is cause shit is cra-cra!

So this life thing, is fucking weird…I mean seriously, it makes no fucking sense.

I need sunglasses and an aspirin for this craziness… (weed and kaleidoscope glasses would also totally fact they would be better!)

I have tried to figure out what direction it is going in, but right when I think I know, things get hooky and I spin in another route.

I try reading the map but can’t figure out which way is up, north or west!

Sometimes the nervous thoughts in my head over power my gut…sometimes my instinct is stronger than doubt….often i don’t know which is which and it confuses the fuck out of me.

From time to time the befuddlement freezes me…and I become isolated for a moment from reality…trying to stoop in the meaning of it all but then I realize I shouldn’t even try to figure out this shit…I should just roll with it…

Often, I simply toss glitter in the air and march, having faith in my sense of the true path and my destiny….sometimes I get the wind wrong and glitter bomb myself!

A lot of times, shit goes down that makes me have the Joey Lawrence “Whoaaaaa” look on my face….sometimes I am so shocked I just have to walk away…daily I wish I had a video camera on me so I could actually document the craziness that I see and experience. (my weirdness levels might be extremely high due to living in the Tenderloin and working on Haight Street…I love it and it is my life, but I yearn for more moments of quiet, serenity and peace.)

Most likely, after the “whoaaaaaaaa” face I get a “huhhhhhhhh” face on.

Occasionally, I hear something that makes me take a knee…

More often than not I have about a 50% reality of what is going on…we could push 60%.

Once in a while a supernatural force shows me the light in the strangest of places if I look at it right.

A wise man once told me, “When the going gets Weird, the Weird get Digital.”

Maybe I should listen to my friend…when shit gets to cra-cra, maybe I should add more glitter, a little more rainbows and start jump-spinning…cause what ever I might be freaking out about would probably be forgotten after the first 3 revolving spins!

And I would look like an orbiting prism…epic!

Cause it is all Weird, it is all Fucked Up…I just got to tuck and roll and protect my neck…or not eat pizza before one goes into a pogo stick/spaz dance move….and embrace the craziness that is life.

It is about dealing with it all with grace and sparkles, dodging the bad or letting it roll of my back and following the good so I know which way to walk…and no matter what…I just need to keep walking….cause there is always an awesome path for me to take (It is actually me that helps make the path so awesome.)

And damm it…If I am lost and confused, I will at least look like a hot sparkle mess!

So…life…it doesn’t make any sense, there is not rhyme or reason…shit is weird….

So I need to go with it….and smell good the entire time!



So this dance move is always better with a great action theme song in your head…I would try to type out the tune that I hum, but I am tone-def as a mother fucker…anyhoo

Start with making a finger gun…make sure that it is fierce…now start your quiet high steps…after about 4 steps…freeze for 5 seconds…than jump alert with your gun aimed at a random someone…they may freak out…details…not the person you were looking for…no worries…get crouched down again, fierce gun stance in place and start to high step again until you stiff out the person that you are looking for and GUN STANCE…what, they are so shocked that you can just grab the joint at of their hand…

Dance move handled!

Tuesday, January 6, 2015

Blog 120: All Along the Watchtower…

Blog 120: All Along the Watchtower…

“There must be some way out of here” said the Joker to the thief…

Have you ever felt trapped in a cocoon, kicking and scratching to break free…the need to fly is greater than the desire to breathe…you are acutely aware that there is so much more out there…so much more to see, to experience…but something is holding you back, tied to you…inhibiting you from crawling to the opening…and you simply yearn to see the light.

I feel in my life that I am capable of so much more, that I have way more potential that I could reach…I simply am unaware of which direction to walk and which instincts to trust.

There is too much confusion…I can’t get no relief…

I am so content and so frustrated all at the same time. It confuses me how I can be so happy yet so sad…so full of love and so alone…I contemplate how far I have come and am in tune with how much farther I must walk…no matter how hard I try, I simply feel conflicted with the deep rooted need to move forward.

And I am petrified of making a mistake that I feel sometimes the fear causes me to stay still. The blankness of the unknown encompasses me, weighing me down so I become stuck in a pile of quick sand…fighting and pleading to be released.

Businessmen, they drink my wine, plowmen dig my earth

I lot of people depend on me in many aspects, sometimes I don’t feel like I have any time for myself or my wants…my needs, I am too busy dealing with whatever desires others deem important. I see them do for them what they need to do and wonder why I don’t get that chance to do for me.

Yet this is something I have put on myself…I have allowed it…I have taken on the responsibility.

I must watch and learn….and figure out the balance to not only do for others but to do for myself as well.

None of them along the line know what any of it is worth.

I contemplate often if the people I give my time to truly understand what it is worth and realize that it takes away from my time…do they appreciate it?

Or just think I have nothing better to do…

Do I need to appreciate the experiences and love they are giving me more or am I just too exhausted to comprehend.

“No reason to get excited” the thief he kindly spoke

I can’t spend all my time contemplating my frustration…if I did that I would never ascend, I can only do what I can and simply be content with that…and know that what I am doing brings great pride.

“There are many here among us who feel that life is but a joke…

Sometimes people I run in to are just delusional (maybe its the all the drugs)…and I feel like to them life is a chess game and they try to make me and others into pawns and pieces in their game. This makes me mad! These are the people that I know for a fact I cannot give my time and energy to, and on the rare occurrences I must…I smile, nod and keep on keeping on. (With a possible glitter bombing as they turn away.)

But you and I, we’ve been through that, and this is not our fate…

But myself (I can’t speak for you) I know that I only have one chance…my fate is to go and do good, or try my very hardest to, not just for myself but for my community and my kingdom. Which is one of the reasons I must remind myself about the need to help others…and not get caught up in the why…only in the need.

So let us not talk falsely now, the hour is getting late.”

These feelings I have about doubt and second thoughts are ones will all have, but we can not be consumed by “what ifs” but only forge ahead towards the dawn.

I can’t get caught up in why other people do what they do and why I do what I do…I would waste all my time thinking and not enough time doing.

All along the watchtower, this princess kept her view

As I have grown one of my favorite things to do has been to sit back and take everything in. To examine how people react to their surroundings…I feel the greatest lessons are among us. In watching how the others live…I acknowledge whether their path is or is not one for me…and I see my future even more brightly. Even through my pain and confusion…the light shines the road of consciousness before me and I am ready to walk in the right direction. As I ascend, the winds begin to howl…..



Are you feeling naughty…are you doing something that you know your friends might have issues with…are you feeling frisky????

We this is the dance move for you (it may be traumatizing for your friends)

Okay, put your pinky finger to the corner of your mouth, and make sure you eyes have that “I’m trouble” smirk and shake it on down now! You have so many options…bending your head down and your booty up, coming up behind someone and doing it while you air hump….doing it with a friend when you are butt to butt. However you do the “Dr Evil” Dance move works…YEAHHHHHHH BABY!