Monday, May 9, 2011


Blog 23…….What is psychedelic……

You know with my loaded ass, I ask myself this question quite often.

Like the other night, I was at a show and some ding dong comes up and starts doing the grabbing dance. (just cause you play drums on a freakin stage does not mean you can fucking grab me bro.) Now what is psychedelic about that is……………if he had only read my fucking blog (the one I wrote the day before I met him)….he would have known and approached better…..see another reason why more people should be reading my fucking blog….…jeezzzzz.

I first learned the answer to the question…

What is Psychedelic……on a very fateful day.

When I lived in Eugene, a great man passed. I had the privilege to go to Ken Kesey’s funeral. It was epicness in a moment. The whole day transformed my life in many ways (some I will touch on in blogs to come.)

I went with my uncle, I remember sitting next to him when Ken Babbs was speaking….he was recapping how he and Ken Kesey had explained what psychedelic is to one of their moms on a trip in the Willamette National Forest… went something like this……….
”Psychedelic is everywhere, it is life, it is in how many shades of green are in this forest, in the fact that the sun rises and sets” ……he then said they saw a snake in the road, and a hawk swooped down to eat it and the car hit the hawk and they turned to her and said… “Now that is psychedelic”

As I left the funeral and watched the Merry Pranksters load his casket into their bus, my uncle and I stood side by side, when the bus went under the Oak St Bridge less than half a block away, a rainbow arched across the sky. I turned to my uncle and said, “Now that is psychedelic.”

I was pretty consumed with stupid stuff at that point in my life….and put in the back of my head what had happened and what I had learned….I was saving it for a better day.

Right before I left Eugene, I went on a late night butt walk. As I closed the door to my car a deer jetted across the street, followed by a possum making odd noises, probably cause a raccoon was humping it…..behind the trio a cat ran, its belly “skirt” swinging from side to side. I leaned against my car door and the thought popped into my head, “Now that is Psychedelic.”

As I began to re-evaluate my life and what I was doing with it more of these realizations formed in my head……

See peeps, everything is psychedelic….LIFE IS PSYCHEDELIC…..we can find it in every thought and every action to reaction.

The fact that I normally rush to run across the street and the day I saw a lady get hit and killed by a bus 5 feet in front of me…is the day I decided not to run across the street….I was tired from debauchery the night before…..that one made me think.

The fact that I go to a place I consider home, The Boom Boom Room to see one of my favorite bands…(Juno what they could be) and my ex-husband’s best friend is playing bass in the opening band, and the sudden rush that I am still not over the collapse of my marriage, and I am still hurt, how one person can make you remember so much pain….how small the world is….that is psychedelic.

The fact that an earthquake and a wave can change a people’s way of life…….is psychedelic.

The fact that someone can meet someone for a split second and have them alter their path in an instant or that we can have a friend that we have known since we were 3 years of age and we have a comfort with them we have with no one else……….

The fact that in one hemisphere the toilet water goes one way, and in the other it goes the other way…..I still don’t get that fucking one.

That people who read my blog feel that they can tell me I wrote stuff that was to dirty and think i give a flying fuck.....that is psychedelic.

The idea that someone as love filled as myself, full of hope and optimism……is a true pessimist when it comes to matters of my heart…….is psychedelic.

The fact that people die, our friends, our family, our dearest members of our heart……and we still find the strength to move on…….

That life is full off such tragedy and pain but full of such light and awesomeness...

The fact that sound is the direct reaction to movement.

The visual amazement I get every time I go to a show and see people dancing to music. That music moves them to move themselves is psychedelic in every way and I love it.

That a thought, a song, a person, a place….has the ability to move us to tears.

The fact that I spent years of my life unhappy and unconfident in myself is psychedelic.

I guess what I am trying to say I have learned…..

When we can really tune into that, we might start letting go of our worries and fears. Things happen because they happen, we see and meet people for a reason, that the lessons we learn in life help us see things in a better light, that there are many different shades of light.

What ever happens when we pass this life……I’m pretty damm sure is psychedelic as a mother fucker to.

We shouldn’t waste time trying to figure out all the details of why and how….we should just enjoy…and realize some things we can’t explain…….

But we sure can enjoy the colors.


Making the Coffee
(even thought I can’t drink coffee anymore, I still remember how the dance goes)

So you get yourself out of bed, maybe a stretch is called for. Alright, shuffle to the kitchen, grab the coffee, I always smell (you should know this by now) ahhhhh, even the smell wakes you up. Now dump the old filter, put the new one in, make sure it is not going to fold over and get grounds in your coffee…alright, scoop the coffee in…now fill up the water….turn it on…..are you going to wait…..not me, I hop back into bed and usually pull the covers all the way up over my head and give myself a little snugglet….cause five more minutes of sleep is five more minutes of sleep…..crap I slept in…..chicken fucker.

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