Blog 26…….Walking the Walk
As I walked off a two day hangover (It was an epic week of redoing floors, working and killer shows…………Pleasure Sessions, Make a Scene, Funky Meters, Dirty Dozen, Katdelic & The Trucks Tedeschi Band) I decided to buy a chocolate old fashion…..eating and walking is my best “hangover cure”…..As I finally felt the air start to run properly through my head the more I walked the more thoughts starting swirling in my mind, as they often do when I walk……….and I thought about Walking the Walk, and not just Talking the Talk.
That shit is hard to do.
And far be it from me to stand on a soap box and preach cause I am no better at it than anyone else. I thought about how it is something we should all work on and maybe make it a goal for this week, or for this life time. Just walk the walk, forget about talking the talk…….that just leads to disappointment…..totally.
I think that is why I am so disappointed in men and have lost so much faith in them this year. And it sucks, I wanna have faith, I wanna believe.
I think that is why I am so disappointed in myself, and have been so harsh on me in recent weeks, I need to nut up and do all that shit I keep on talking about……..see sometimes I to, can be a chicken fucker…times 10.
We all need to stop fucking talking and start fucking doing……save your breath, shut the fuck up, and just do what you think you should do.
Since I have moved to the Tenderloin I have had almost a dozen men say that they love me……One of them I believe (only cause he has shown it.) My futon was old and I could not feel my legs after I slept, 3 men offered to buy me a new bed, one of them after offering twice, offered to buy me half a bed……..what the fuck, just don’t tell me you all are going to buy me a fucking bed, I’m not going to love you over a bed or not, it is not going to make a relationship, and you know who I got a freaking bed from, my mom and dad…(thank you mom and dad you rock times 10000000, I now feel my legs in the morning when I wake up) 4 boys have said they would take me to New Orleans,….never been…still, 5 boys have told me they will take me all around the world……still in the tenderloin, 10 boys have said that they want a relationship with me and want to treat me right……..I have a non-committed relationship with one off them (your all batting average sucks) One offered to pay my rent and help nurture my writing and take care of me, than was confused when I thought we were in a relationship………..why would I think that…chicken fucker.
…I just had a boy promise me all this stuff again…….and in the back of my head, I just can’t believe, because how many times do we promise shit that we never follow through with.
And the fact of the matter is, all these boys I like for who they are and not what they can do for me, but what they hold inside. If they had just shut the fuck up and been them and be honest with me, I wouldn’t be so disappointed. Because I would not expect them to do all the shit they promised.
I think I would believe……….”I will do the best that I can.” Cause that sounds fucking honest.
But who the fuck am I to be all high and mighty, I am no better, and the only way for me to get out of this funk is to nut up and do what I keep on saying I am going to do. I need to stop wasting my breath and put my thoughts to work, because that is what is really going to make me happy.
I have been talking about doing my audio-blogs, need to get on that shit, I have a band organized to do my “tenderloin, crack head dance party” with my white girl dances, why have I not gotten that shit together, I need to write a letter of apology to an old friend, I need to loose the 5lbs I want to, I need to get my shit together, I need to catch up on work, work out everyday, wake up early………..and I need to do it now!
Because while I am great at talking the talk, I am no better than anyone else at walking the walk.
I guess what I am trying to say is we should all shut the fuck up and GO act. Talking shit up is just a waste of time, and we could be using those precious minutes of life to actually act and DO the things we really want to do, and experience the life we should, and BE the kind of people we need to be.
That was my grandmother’s motto in life. (talk about a Queen)
Go, Do something, and Become.
I want to become someone that Walks the Walk and does not just Talk the Talk.
What about you?
A friend recently told me a quote from someone, I forgot who, it was something like, “Psychedelics are a window into enlightenment, we should take what we learn during those moments and bring it back to our life and try to become what we have learned. That we should learn all those lessons that were revealed to us and try to walk the walk. Because once we stop just talking the talk, but truly Walking the Walk, we have been enlightened.”
It is time for me to shut the fuck up.
Dance Move of the Week
Got to thank my ex-husband for this one, but you got to give credit where credit is due.
THE BIRD OF PREY…….
Have you ever been at a show and smelt the stickiest of the ickiest….or that stick to every one of your fingers hash….your nose goes straight in the air and you look around feverly and you know you have got to have a hit, and you look and it is your friend, puffing down.
Well….point yourself in their direction, put your arms out wide and start to flap them up and down as you walk over letting out a “CRAWEEEEKKKKKK CRAWWKKKKLWLL” noise, swoop in (preferably to the left of the person taking a hit) and enter the circle…..by the time the dance move has been figured out you will be blowing out a hit saying
“It’s the Bird of Prey dance move.”