Monday, May 30, 2011

Blog 27.....Limo Confessions....(Part II)

Blog 27…….LIMO CONFESSIONS…..(Part II)

Okay, I do take cabs, I even have a little flashlight/whistle thingy in my need a cab outside the Boom Boom Room at 4am, I can start wheeling them in bitches. I even have one cabbie that will send one of his “fleet” to pick me up at anytime...but...

Let us remember the simple fact...I am a Princess...and if I can get a limo/towncar for the same price of a awesomeness of an ass will be in the limo...thank you very much.

Limo Confessions Part One is Blog 15.

Limo Driver C...

My friends from Eugene were down visiting and it was their last day in town. We were going to the Stanton Moore show that night (um...Awesomeness in a show...totally...times 10) We had wondered the park all day, boom box playing, colors everywhere, and as we trudged back up to their hotel past Union Square one of them decided to stop for a burrito.

Me, being loaded and bored.. (I truly dislike waiting) Decided to do my “Directing the Traffic” Dance. As I directed drivers one way or the other on Powell Steet, and helped J-Walkers accomplish their goals, a stretched-limo pulled up to a stop. He was not following my traffic controlling rules...

Yet I could not get mad because he rolled down his window, and the dready handed me his business card and said, “I’ll take you anywhere for $20”

“Totally” was all I had time to say before the window was up and he was off.

You all have got to love my “white girl” dance moves and how they pay off.

And yes, we rolled to the Stanton Moore show in the stretch-limo...would you expect anything less from a princess.

***side note
...this driver also ending up being one of my two limo drivers set to pick my crew up from the Widespread Panic shows a month later. He is the one who came through. When you are dealing with drivers who you are paying cash to, and they are suppose to pick you up from a show...ALWAYS HAVE AT LEAST TWO OPTIONS...cause you know some chicken fucker, grow a bunch of pot and like to just throw money at people (you are not all like that, but you know what kind of peeps I’m talking about, but I don't mind riding in his limo,) is going to come out of the show and see a limo and offer the driver some serious cash to blow the person off they were suppose to pick up and take their crew around. Instead of being pissed about shit like that, I am just always prepared, and know that even if I get two drivers, the likely hood of them finding peeps to pick up after a Panic show is very high...and yes my first driver all of a sudden stopped answering my calls...thank god for two limo drivers.***

TownCar Driver B...
I love towncar driver “B” I would only love him even more if I could smoke pot in his towncar, and yes, I probably ask him about once a month, but to be honest, I am so glad I know him, I really don’t give a flying fuck.

This guy is what a towncar driver should be.

I first met him on my way to a Katdelic concert, it was raining, I was working the merchandise table at the show and I was running late...and of course no I flagged down anything I could from airport shuttles (they are cheap ways to get around town, trust me) to towncars. Well driver “B” stopped and I asked him how much...he said 10 bucks (this is how much a cab would cost there)...hell yes I hopped in that towncar.

I asked him if I could smoke pot in his car, he told me “no”...I just had to ask.

Well it turns out, there was some serious traffic, so homie and I just talked and I made him laugh and what now due to traffic would have been a $20 cab ride, was still a $10 towncar ride. I totally took his number.

And you know what, homie works 5 nights a week, still only charges me $10, if there is more people in the car he ups it to $15, but for just me, it is always that flat rate. He always picks me up if he can, and will even send a friend.

And he comes in handy for many reasons….

1. You can be 5 minutes late, he waits, he is your extra charge.

2. I am a BISS girl remember, so for me to see 3-4 shows a night is regular, I cannot do this if I have to try to flag a cab down on a busy weekend night when I am on time crunch. A perfect example of this is when my ladies and I went to Zigaboo, Galactic, Ivan Neville’s Dumpsterfunk, and to the Boom Boom Room for the after Galactic show with Stanton Moore. We all were BISS girls so we had free tickets to all the shows for some reason or another, I wasn’t really drinking that night, so all I had to pay for was getting my ass from show to show. We set out a plan and told towncar driver “B” what time to pick us up at each show. He charged us $10 bucks a trip and didn’t have us pay him till the end. We were able to walk out of each show, into the towncar, and jet off to the next, we caught almost each show in its entirety, our timing was perfect the whole night...none of it would have been possible if it weren’t for my most awesomeness of a driver, we tipped him $20, for a total of 60 bucks, between three ladies, that is a cheap evening out, filled with some serious music there peeps.

3. He lets me fit six in the car for a little extra. It’s a towncar, its roomy as fuck, you can put the big guy in the front, at least one fits on the floor behind the driver’s seat, and four in the back...we do it all the time, once we did it to Oakland after the Willie Nelson show at the Fillmore, we were trying to catch the David Grisman Show, we pulled up right as the show was ending, but all our friends were there so towncar driver “B” waits for us to have drinks with our friends and chat it up, then we all pile back in the towncar and head back across the bridge to the Boom Boom Room to continue the evening of music.

4. He lets me expand his musical mind. I think one of the reasons he loves me so much is because I tell him about all this music to check out and he digs it. If I have an extra ticket to a show, I offer it to him. When I went to go see John Scofield recently, I had to go to another show right after, and I realized that they had stopped checking tickets….he was going to take me to the next venue so I told him to come on in and check this shit out. Him and I stood at the back of Grace’s Cathedral on the Labyrinth in awe...he looked at me as we left and I knew he had been moved like I was...I think he appreciates me, as much as I appreciate him.

5. He has set the bar…..

Towncar Driver “C”
I first met this driver one day when I was rushing to work. I try to walk to work everyday, but I hate to be late. One day I tried to walk, but realized I was going to be late, so I was on hunt for a cab...of course, whenever I really need a cab...thank god...a towncar on the horizon. As he pulled up I asked how much to take me where I need to go opening the door....he told me $25, I laughed and closed the door.

He then rolled down his window and said, “This is a Limo, I usually charges 40 bucks, I am already giving you a discount.”

I responded with...”This is a towncar, I am a princess, and I my driver charges me $10 per ride on weekend nights, $25 at 3pm on a Tuesday is ludicrous.”

He looked me up and down and said...”Okay, you are my new VIP..anywhere you want to go...ten bucks, you can call anytime.”

I really don’t know how shit like this happens to me, but awesomeness times 11.

I then asked if I could smoke pot in his car...”No” was his answer...A girl has got to ask.

So now not only do I have a towncar driver when I need it at night, I got a daytime one too...
Whoop whoop bitches.

You know what time it is...

Let’s Dance



This dance can serve many purposes...but lets get the move down first.
Hold the broom in your hand and start to sweep, broad, firm & fast strokes are the best............
And go back and make sure you cover all your ground, sweep, sweep, sweep (this is a great time to look for any “ground score” opportunities, as well as get the annoying guy that won’t stop hitting on you out of your area...sweep his ass out!) Now it is time for the dustpan, you can do one of two moves here. Either place the dustpan on your foot and use that for your leverage to collect your pile or bend over and hold the dustpan to do it and choke up on the broom. I do the later of the two moves, because, welllll.....a chance to show off my awesome ass, is a chance to show off my awesome ass...totally.

1 comment:

  1. <3 Sunny I so wish there was some way to share your posts or for you to be allowed to publish without the "Adult Content" restriction. Don't want to open a can of worms here but seriously... You got something to say girl. The One's who you are not easily accessible to are Totally Missing out x 1000

    <3 Big Hug <3